I'm 17 and 19 weeks pregnant.. I must've conceived literally days before I started my 2nd year in college in September... I've had awful morning sickness which is still going, I'm still sick everyday and I'm really emotional and can't stop crying at everything lol 
Well I've been doing exams this week and my tutor's pulled me up...my attendance is 51% and they want to know tomorrow if I'm staying or going... given me one night to make my mind up. The original plan was to have my June baby then take a gap year and start uni in September 2013. My tutor really made me think though, I don't know if I can handle this. I was nearly in hospital over christmas because my sickness was that bad and since it's only got a little bit better. I feel really sick 24/7, getting up at half seven makes me feel really lightheaded all day too as I'm having real difficulty sleeping. I don't live with any family, I live with my partner who's 25 and didn't do so great at school so he's relying on me to go to uni etc... (he works 4 nights a week just to support us all even though he hates his job) if I have a day off laid on the couch throwing up and crying he complains about it all day saying 'so I have to work nights the rest of my life then...' I don't bring in an income, he can't claim anything for me and I can't claim anything until Crumb's born so we're both just a drain on the income at the minute. We're trying to do this on a £800 a month income and it's driving me mad. We can barely afford to eat when it comes to the end of every month and I'm at my wits end... My tutor told me to think who I'm really here for and truth is, I hate college, I really do. I only come so I can make the months I'm having to spend living off my partner worth it later. But if I leave now I've wasted half a year in education...but with 51% attendance, I'm going to do really badly in the exams anyway. I'm close to breaking down writing this, I just need some advice :'(
I don't wanna leave him working nights while I raise our child for the next few years but I don't want to redo my 2nd year in September with a 3 month old baby as affording childcare isn't an option at all unless I live off fluff... Just want to walk off a cliff at the minute, I'm behind in so much work but I'm so ill all the time I don't know what to do... I needed a vent, and some opinons... if I choose to stay at college I can't miss a single lesson or they throw me out and won't let me reapply.. If I leave of my own free will I can come back whenever before I'm 21...help?
by LilynCrumb 16 January 2012
Hi 9 months ago i was in the same education situation. i was doing child care at collage and had to be up every morning at 6.30. This made me ill and in the end i ended up in hospital lucky my little girl was ok. but by what you are saying i dont think you will be able to go collage everyday untill your course is done and, its not healthy you might end up worse then what i did. i also thought i had wasted a year but either way your not going to do very well this year, so you mase well just quit now. ino its hard to admit defeat but its best for both you and your baby. when my little girl was just 5 months old i went back to collage and now doing hairdressing 3 days a week which i love and its great to have time away as a teenager. Nursery if free if your on a full time course so theres no need to worry about nursery fees. As for your partner i think you need to explain to him how ill your feeling and its not good for the baby its stressful for both of you but you need to tell him it will get better and yes he may be working nights atm but theres nothing you can do about that as no one would hire you while your pregnant even if you wanted them to. I think he is being unreasonable and needs to do this and support his new family. Maybe you should move back with your parents if thats possible? if not times are hard but will get better i lived with my mum till my girl was 5 months and moved out now its still hard it will be untill i have finished collage but i look forwards and everything i do is for my daughter and so should you. I hope this has helped as i no from experience its really hard.
by mummytasha 16 January 2012
Nursery won't be free for us as my partner works full time
Thanks for the advice though! x
And my mum can't have me back, she's already converted my full room and 8 of my siblings live with her so she doesn't have the space or money
by LilynCrumb 16 January 2012
@LilynCrumb maybe look into them sending work via email on the days your off so you still get the work done and still getting an education but won't need to make yourself ill because of getting to college and spending long days exerting yourself when you could be resting. If that's not an option maybe take time out of education and look into online courses or an access course which you get to do if you've been out of education for at least 12months. In the year you take off you could spend time with your baby and maybe look into part-time work, even if its just a few hours a week because at least then your getting a better income but still have a future in education and later a good career. Obviously I don't know if that will work for your circumstances but just an idea, but what you really need to do is ask to sit and talk with your tutor/mentor and discuss all the options that may be there for you. Xx
by lifes_a_test 16 January 2012
My tutor's really been unhelpful. She in her own words doesn't know what I can do but she doesn't think I'm in a suitable situation to be in the college. She wants to know tomorrow if I'm staying or going and if I'm staying then she's making me sign an agreement to say I'll stay until my due date if my pregnancy lasts that long and if I have a day off or am late to a single day then the college is automatically going to revoke my place... Expecting me to stay until my due date is ridiculous when it takes me an hours travel to get there in the first place so I really feel like I have no choice and it's killing me, I feel like such a failure
Don't know what I'm doing having a baby when my own life's such a mess. Crumb was unplanned and has come at the worst possible time, it's really getting difficult and nobody seems to understand, guess I'm just looking for some advice and support, thank you both xx
by LilynCrumb 16 January 2012
hi hun i no you feel bad on your partner but just put his feelings aside for a min and think wot u want remember your carrying the baby not him it really wont hurt him to work 4 nights a week... Thats just life i no im being abit harsh but you are more important than him right now x
by abi19 16 January 2012